Atty in New Zealand - by Mum & Dad

It was 1986 when we decided we would like to have an AFS student come and share our lives for a year. Our daughter, Julie had been to Boston on an AFS experience and we were well immersed in AFS activities having, between us, served as counsellor, President, on the selection panel as well as hosting activities etc. 

With Mum & Michelle In Shantytown - 1986

We had spent 4 years living in Malaysia in the sixties and thought it would give us an advantage in hosting a Malay student. Having three daughters we decided that a girl would fit in best with our family. It was with great excitement that we received the papers for Atty Sulaiman and read about the young woman we were about to share our lives with.

With Dad & Michelle at Pancake Rocks - 1986

My visit to NZL - April 1996

Atty arrived and was very quiet and shy – for a little while. We knew it was difficult for her getting used to our climate, family, the school and last but not least: food. Not only did she have to get used to life in Palmerston North but we moved to Wanganui half way through her stay so she had another school to contend with and had to make new friends again.

We didn't realise just how much we were to learn from Atty. Even though we had spent 4 years living in her country she was able to give us really personal knowledge on the customs and people of Malaysia. 

We admired Atty's spirit and courage to try out new things. She said that she was not going to pass up on any experience as it may not be given to her again. So, she tried out all sorts of things, even canoeing the Wanganui River. Experiencing 104 rapids, getting caught in a whirlpool and camping out on the side of the river was all new for her. 

Mum & Dad's Visit to Malaysia - April 2000

Having had the experience of having students live in her house and share her family life, she had advice for other students. I think the most important piece of advice she gave was: do not compare. That is, don't compare your family with someone else's; don't compare the food you get with home food; don't compare the home you are living in with your own home or another students home. It is all a new experience so make the most of it.
 Of course with an attitude like that the year was the best for us and for her. We really enjoyed Atty.

In 1988 we saw Atty in Singapore as we passed through on our way to Europe. The next year we visited Atty's family. We met all the extended family and enjoyed life in their home. What a great experience that was and certainly added to our knowledge of Malaysia.

Atty came back to visited us in 1996, not long after her marriage. That was so delightful to have her to ourselves again. In 2000 we once again went to KL and spent some time with Atty, Zaher, and the children, further adding to our experience. In  2006  we were fortunate to have Atty come and visit us again and she was able to catch up with her growing NZ family.

Until the next time we meet, we keep in touch with MSN, having little chats and keeping up to date with what is happening in each other's lives.

The presence of Atty in our lives has meant that we gained a lovely daughter and a life-long relationship.  

                                                Tony and Valerie Cowan

                                                Wanganui

                                                                New Zealand